Gratitude

I have been really quite negative and depressed lately. I really really don't like being sick, and its frustrating when it gets in the way of what I want and need to be doing. I can usually handle it for a day or two, but we're going on week 5 here and I've had little relief. So I've been dwelling on that, thinking about that, whining about that. I can imagine that people may be avoiding me so they don't have to hear about it.

So yesterday as we were waiting for a meeting, a friend came in flustered, sat down and handed me this bottle of soap saying (paraphrased of course...) "I've been thinking about Elder Wirthlin's talk, Come what may and love it." I looked down and on the bottle it says "grateful hands". I thought to myself..that was a good talk, I should read it again. Then she went on to tell us some frustrating things that happened that morning. A few minutes later my friend said "Did I say Merry Christmas when I gave that to you?" I laughed and said no, you told me "Come what may and love it". While that wasn't her intended message to me, I believe it was the Lords message to me.

For our Christmas lesson next week my part is talking about Gratitude and Service. This morning I pulled out my scriptures, new era's etc. and laid in bed a while reading. I thought of so many things that I am grateful for. As I read scriptures and quotes from prophets and thought about how much the Lord loves me and has blessed me, I began feeling sorry for the negative feelings I've allowed myself to wallow in these past weeks. I also read in the New Era about forgiving yourself, and there were some great insights on that topic. So I made a resolution to focus on the things that I am grateful for instead of how sick I may be feeling. And also to forgive myself as the Lord has, for the past weeks of self pity.

I truly have much to be grateful for. Most of all for my Savior, Jesus Christ. I am so grateful for His kindness, mercy, love, teachings. I am so grateful for His Gospel and the Hope I gain from learning of him and following him. And I'm grateful for friends who, whether intentional or not, remind me what's important.

Merry Chirstmas

Merry Christmas to All,
As we get Christmas Cards in the mail, and as Christmas get closer we realize we will not be sending a Christmas Card this year, so here is our Christmas Blog Card.

At this Christmas season, we are very grateful for this last year. Bailee is 2 and continues to grow and learn everyday. She is very excited to be a big sister. She has learned so much this last year. She loved the time she spent with Grandma and Grandpa Spencer in Alamo while Traci was at Girls Camp, and is excited to see Grandma and Grandpa Bulkley next week when they get back from their mission. She loves nursery at church, and to pretend she is different people (Mickey Mouse, Dora, Cinderella, Ariel ). She loves to watch movies and seems to have a new favorite everyday.

Traci and Luke are doing mostly the same. Luke is still working at Hertz. He enjoys playing sports and doing different activities with the family in his spare time. Traci is still loving with Close To My Heart. She spends most of her day trying to keep up with Bailee.

We hope you all enjoy a very Merry Christmas, and a Happy New Year. May the spirit of Christ be with you all through the year, and may we be grateful for the everlasting gift of our Savior Jesus Christ.

Bailee's Turkey!

November 17, 2008

Happy Birthday Luke!

Today is Luke's birthday! I hope you have a great day honey, sorry you have to work.
Luke is so amazing! I am truly blessed to have found him. He is the hardest working person I know. If there's something that needs to be done, he just does it. Never waits to see if someone else will do it.
I love that he doesn't believe that housework is my work. He is always cleaning up around the house and helping me out. I so appreciate this! Especially since I've been so sick and haven't been doing much of anything.
Luke is even doing the cooking these days, what a sweetheart I have! I love watching him with Bailee. She has him wrapped around her little finger. When she hears him coming in from work she runs to open the door. His face lights up when he sees her, and she adores him almost as much as I do.
Luke is so much fun! He never stops to worry about if someone will think he's crazy or weird. He loves life, and lives it to the fullest. He can relax and have a good time, but he knows when it's time to be serious.
Luke has taught me so much! I look up to him a ton, and try to follow the wonderful example he is to us. I'm so grateful to be married to him, and that he is my very best friend.




We love you daddy!!

No pictures today. I don't want to go find the camera.....

So in case you haven't noticed the little widget to the right, we are expecting a new baby. Bailee knows she's going to be a big sister, but I don't think she really knows what that means. Every once in awhile she'll tell us she has a big sister in her tummy. She wants a 'girl' baby and even knows the name we like. Funny girl.

My parents and 2 youngest sisters are in New York this week. They are having a blast, and it's fun hearing about all the cool stuff they are doing. They sent a picture of the Statue of Liberty to our cell phone and when I showed Bailee she said "OOOO Kansas!" Kansas?? Not sure where she got that from. The fam was on the Today show this morning, so we taped it to show Luke. I paused it and asked Bailee to come and see. She looked at it and said...insert gasp "Grammy and Grammpy". She thought it was so funny.

We painted the downstairs room....well, it was mostly Luke....and we're getting ready to move some furniture around. Mom and Dad B. will be home in just under 3 weeks. I can't believe it! We are super excited.

I have been soooooo sick. I won't lie, it's been miserable. I'm open to any suggestions to help fight the nausea. I'm also pretty emotional, though I try and hide it. I am getting a little frustrated. People are going to ask me how I'm feeling, and I'm not going to tell them great when I feel like crawling in a hole. So if you don't really want to know, don't ask. And then there's the guilt trip. I know that there are people who have a really hard time getting pregnant or have never had that chance. I'm sorry, I really am. And I wish that wasn't your trial. I wish that everyone who wanted to have children could. I do feel blessed to have a beautiful daughter, and to be pregnant once again. But no one could possibly be throwing up round the clock while being happy and positive all of the time. It sucks big time, and while I am happy to be having another baby, I'm not happy to be this sick. This must be my trial. I'll learn to manage it.